mannequin trigger

Today we went to the mall and I was poking around and then went to Victoria Secrets to just look around & the fucking mannequin triggered me a bit. I want to be as thin as that fucking mannequin!!!!
I know I can't be it's height but still.....
Tomorrow, I'm getting up as a normal hour by like 8am and I'm going to have oatmeal(100 calorie oatmeal package) & scrambled egg whites(it's the 100% liquid egg whites)(I'll put some red pepper flakes and Frank's Red Hot on it)
(Spiciness is suppose to supposedly speed up your metabolism so then you'll be burning even more calories. I know that my BMR is 1628.5 if that's even really correct or not)
(In order to have my BMI of 20 I'll have to weigh 102lbs)
I'll measure out the egg whites. Then afterwards I'll take my Adderall XR.
Also I need to get this blood work done so I can go to the gym and work out with the trainer. I'm fucking nervous about working with a trainer. I do want to work with him/her then go by myself to do the pool and sauna and I have an treadmill and elliptical here at the house. I just need to get fucking motivated to use the elliptical since I can't use the treadmill right now.

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